Are you putting your man on a pedestal?
Pedestals are for sculptures, not partners … and even not for sculptures anymore.
There’s no use of a pedestal anymore.
An amazing thing happened in contemporary sculpture in the last 30 years.
Sculptures had stepped down to the ground.
It feels incredibly powerful to me to meet a sculpture like that.
They became one of us.
They’re sitting with us on branches in parks.
They’re meeting us eye to eye in city squares.
I just love sculptures like that.
They feel amazing to me.
Today you can find those urban sculptures in many places, they’re practically alive and they inspire us with their presence and the way they’re included in everyday life.
A contemporary sculpture doesn’t need any pedestal anymore.
It stands in the ground and is one of us.
Pedestal had to die since there is no use anymore for sculptures that would look down to us from high above.
There’s no need any more for sculptures that would make us feel scared or that would make us feel small.
Sculptures are here to inspire us to become our beautiful authentic self and to know that if someone before us had the power to make it, then we can make it too.
What about our loved ones?
Do we allow them to be real and authentic here and now?
Or are we letting our fear of a good relationship putt labels of perfection and glorification on them…
How does it feel to have your loved one on a pedestal?
Does it feel good?
Oh I have had men on a pedestal.
I’ve been giving them enormous value.
And at the same time I was making them unavailable to me.
I felt scared and a high and cold pedestal was a perfect place to have men on.
And I felt horrible desperate and unworthy of love.
Let’s look at this closely; what does a pedestal do for a sculpture?
It makes it worshiped and it makes it safe.
Isolated.
A sculpture on the pedestal is not exposed to life.
It is above life.
It is something more.
It makes us feel small.
It makes us feel unworthy.
It makes us worship.
And now if I go back into the old feelings and I imagine there is a man that I truly love and I put him on a pedestal.
How do I feel?
Oh my God…
It makes my stomach feel sick.
It makes me feel heavy.
It makes me close down and I feel like a piece of ice that can never be happy.
Then I look at him, at my beloved one that stands on that pedestal.
He’s begging me to come down.
He feels unsure.
He wants to come to me, but he can’t.
He feels hopeless and desperate, he says he wants to love me, but he cannot from high above…
And he’s saying that if will not allow him to get down, than he will run away from me, he will never want to see me again.
So, what do you think?
Has the time come to stop putting our beloved ones on pedestals once and forever just like we stopped with sculptures?
Write to me here…
With love,
Katja